He thought, thereby confirming his nerd-dom . . .
Hat-tip to My[confined]Space.
That’s Monica Bellucci by the way.
My Five Word Review Of “The Pacific”
It ain’t Band of Brothers.
Okay, here are a few more words. It isn’t even close to being Band of Brothers. Maybe it would have been different if it had come out first and didn’t have to be compared to Band of Brothers, but even then I’m not sure. It’s not that the story of the Marine’s epic battles in the Pacific isn’t as compelling as the story of the Army’s epic battles in the Europe – it is – it’s just that the true story of the men of E Company is much more compelling that the semi-true story of the part real-part composite Marines in The Pacific. I just can’t seem to connect with the characters in The Pacific the way I did with those in Band of Brothers and I guess that is why.
Of course, I had already connected with E Company because I had read the book and that gave me an insight into those men that I just don’t have with these guys, who like I said, are a mixture of real and fake Marines. The only two I have any interest in are the legendary (then) Lieutenant Colonel Lewis ‘Chesty’ Puller and Medal of Honor recipient Gunnery Sergeant John Basilone, both incredibly interesting individuals who unfortunately are not in the whole series. So what I have left is just a sort of generic Marine war movie which really has been done before and better.
The Sands of Iwo Jima and The Flying Leathernecks for example. John Wayne anyone?
My Oscar Review
I watched some of the Oscars last night – the first time in four years – and I enjoyed seeing James Cameron get his ass kicked (which is why I watched in the first place). While The Hurt Locker is insulting to the military in many ways, Avatar was much worse in that regard so I can’t complain. Of course, Up should have won Best Picture, but what cha’ gonna do.
Speaking of Avatar versus The Hurt Locker, it was fun to see Hollywood reward a small well-made film instead of a CGI-carried horror while also proving that Cameron is not only disliked by the public but by his peers as well.
It was nice to see Sandra Bullock win Best Actress for her role as a conservative Christian performing an incredibly kind act without the government’s help or suggestion – a minor miracle there – but most of her speech was bad acting, which is something a Best Actress winner shouldn’t be caught doing. She really loves her man though, at least as much as I hate him because he gets to bang that all the time.
Steve Martin sucked, but Alec Baldwin wasn’t half-bad (he left his bad part on the phone with his poor daughter I suppose). Why they felt the need to drag Barbara Streisand out of her coffin I can’t imagine, except that she made all the other women look even prettier.
I’m also glad Jeff Bridges won. Haven’t seen Crazy Heart, but he’s The Dude and therefore deserving of all things good. Plus he played one of the best presidents in film, whose use of presidential food in intimidating other politicians is priceless, and I’ve wanted to taste a shark sandwich every since I saw this scene.
Let me see. What else?
Oh yes, the overall production sucked, but that was to be expected based on what I’ve read every year. (Again, I haven’t watched in a long time.)
I really hated the long speeches by the “friends”/co-workers of the Best Actress and Best Actor nominees. They were way, Way, WAY over the top as is usual, and it’s no wonder these people think they can pontificate on every known subject in the universe – they are definitely legends in their own minds. That ginger actress with the bad teeth and tiny boobs whose name I can never remember knew Colin Firth for three fricken days and she came to the conclusion that he was evidently a better person than Gandhi, the Dalai Lama, and Mother Teresa all rolled in one? Give me a break. And Oprah telling the obviously talented young woman, Gabourey Sidibe, who was nominated for her role in Precious: Based on the Novel Push by Sapphire that she has a great career in front of her? Please, on what planet is she going to get roles in the “looks are everything” film industry. Not planet Hollywood that is for sure.
Well, that’s it. Nothing particularly novel in my observations here, but I needed a post and this was it.
Brunette Of The Week
And for those who don’t appreciate the brunette or the color purple, here are The 50 Worst Movies Ever. I’ve seen most of them, which doesn’t speak well of my choices in entertainment I must admit.
H/T to Theo for the babe of course.
I Want To Hang With John Cusack In A Disaster
Because he is the luckiest guy alive. At least in 2012 which I saw yesterday and which I will briefly review for you folks. I don’t think I am spoiling anything but be warned.
1. Great special effects. It makes The Day After Tomorrow look downright boring (which it was, but not because of the special effects).
2. Like I said, John Cusack is the guy to hang with in a disaster. He and his family are literally inches from death again and again and somehow manage to outrun it on planes, trains and automobiles. Well, not trains really, the folks on those are screwed. But give Cusack a limo or camper or his wife’s “had three flying lessons” boyfriend an airplane large or small, and they leave death behind in their dust.
3. As reported in the news, everything Muslim is safe in the 2012 world-ending disaster, while Christianity and Buddhism take a big hit. No word on how atheists make out, but I swear I saw Bill Maher crying and hugging Janeane Garofalo while they both screamed, “It’s all Bush’s fault.” Of course it could have just been indigestion from all those Sour Patch Kids I was eating, but tell me they wouldn’t be doing just that should the world end.
4. Some totally unnecessary deaths that disappointed. I’m not sure what the director was thinking, but the movie would have been much better without them.
5. The only bad guy was an older American white guy of course, although he was offset by a number of good Americans doing good things. The fact that the bad older American white guy had some valid points (basically think saving humanity triage) was lost in all the kumbaya stuff. And really, the Russians and the Germans are more humane than the Americans? I know this is fiction, but jeez, Stephen King’s clown in the sewer is more believable.
All in all a good escapist flick which will keep your attention unless your Alma mater just happens to be kicking Tennessee’s ass 42-17 while you are in the movie (sigh), with a good performance by Woody Harrelson, who you just know is as crazy in real life as he is in this movie.
Check it out.
The Other 100 Best Movie Quotes Of All Time
Probably not the ones you have heard before. Some are very vulgar so be warned.
Hat-tip to Fiddle Dee Dee.
This Post Approved By Badass Baby
1. Break out the frying pan, today is International Bacon Day.
2. Men lose their minds when talking to pretty women. Followed at some point by their manhood, wallets, houses, cars, and other real property.
3. Sci-Fi’s Most Beautiful Stars:1933 – 2008. Being a big fan of Sci Fi and a big fan of women obviously I had to post this. Favorites are Caroline-Munro, Jenny Agutter, Carrie Fisher in her slave-girl costume (yum), and Monica Belluci (double yum). Some of these aren’t really Sci Fi films though. Ghost? The Princess Bride? And where the frack is Sigourney Weaver?
4. People of Wal-Mart. My Wal-Marts are never as interesting as these seem to be, or maybe I just haven’t noticed because I’m one of these people of Wal-Mart.
5. Deep-fried butter. So good it tastes like buttaaaa. Deep-fried buttaaa.
6. Speaking of food, how about some Hawaiian Shaved Ice. The one with the beans and condensed milk is intriguing although if you’re lactose intolerant the legume/milk combo might be deadly to you and anyone else within a three mile radius.
7. How to apologize like a man. And when not to which is just as important I think. Groveling is usually appropriate if it involves the wife.
** Thanks to Ace for the, what the hell does one call it, “Acealanch?” I wish it were for something profound or funny or just for something I had written at all, but instead all I got was a video I stole from someone else. But what the hell, I’ll take what I can get
“The Gluconate Guy, He’s Out Of A Job”
I just finished reading The Informant and I have to say it is one of the best books I have read in years. This true story reads like some of the best spy novels every written, making the boring world of price-fixing and corporate fraud investigations look like a Jame Bond novel sans all the killing, martini, and hot women of course.
Okay, so it’s not Bond, but you get the point.
I can’t recommend it enough.
That said, the trailer for the upcoming movie by the same name looks just as good. It does appear to play the story more for laughs than the book, but if you’re just reading the book and have Matt Damon in mind as the main character Mark Whitacre, you can really see how it had to work out that way. The fact is the whole story is one big laugh. Incredible, unbelievable, improbable and yet so true to how real federal investigations work, and sometimes work out despite the best of intentions, that it is much like reading a good war novel when the author actually talked to someone in the military before he wrote it.
Here’s hoping the movie lives up to the book.
My Review Of GI Joe
My youngest son and I went to see GI Joe yesterday and surprise of surprises I actually enjoyed it. Yeah, he wasn’t like the all-American GI Joe of my youth, but . . .
Well, I take that back, because the main GI Joe, Duke, and his funny sidekick Ripcord were very much like the All-American GI Joe of my youth. At least as much as any modern American soldier could be like the GI Joe of my youth, which was a World War II type in all his semi-professional, citizen soldier glory. But modern American soldiers aren’t like that now. They’re all professionals all the time. Even the part-timers (if there is such a thing any longer). Sleek, honed warriors who, except for sharing the courage, dedication, and patriotism of their World War II predecessors, have little in common with the mostly brave amateur soldiers who fought that great war.
(Please don’t think I am dissing our World War II vets. My father is a World War II vet. All I am saying is that comparing the modern American military to the WWII American military is like comparing apples and oranges in many ways. Of course there were professional soldiers at that time. Skilled warriors in their own right. But they led a vast citizen soldier force who, while certainly being battle-hardened during the war, were still not the trained professional military we have now. Hell, our military today is in many ways more professional than it was when I served during the later days of the Cold War.)
At least that’s my take.
Anyway, I am off-topic.
What I meant to say was that the GI Joes in this movie seemed pretty-damn American and I mean that in the best way possible. Yes, now GI Joe is an acronym for something called “Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity” instead of “Government Issue” Joe, but past that and the generically lame looking camouflage uniforms they sure seemed American to me.
First you have Dennis Quaid who is about as American as they come even when he is dressed like some French hip-hop rapper in a leather Member’s Only jacket. Then, like I said, both Duke and Ripcord are American and, despite their British and somewhat East-Indian accents, the rest of the main crew seemed pretty darn American too. And certainly the general can-do, kick-ass attitude coupled with the ultra-modern, ultra-cool war toys seemed American so matter how silly their camouflage uniforms looked, especially Quaid’s lame jacket. (It’s bad enough to mention twice.)
Point is if you weren’t going to see this movie because of some protest about them “Europeanizing” GI Joe, well, get past it. The movie is a smash-fest with great special effects, action-packed chase scenes and very cool military weapons and toys that you know our own military is working on even today (assuming Obama doesn’t cut them from the budget).
I do have a two nits to pick though. One, Duke is referred to as a Captain in the movie but in flash-back scenes he is wearing the gold leaves of a Major. I assume they changed his rank later and didn’t think to re-shoot (or more likely figured no one would notice), but it stuck out at me and no doubt all the military types who saw it. Secondly, he had a fricken goatee both in the flashback, and while I was never in the US Army, I am pretty sure that is not allowed. There were a few other military mistakes made that I noted and I am sure there were even more that I didn’t see, but it’s those small things that can spoil a military movie for us military types.
Despite those little things though, if you want to see a fast-paced shoot-em-up, blow-em-up, summer feel-good war movie, then check GI Joe out. I don’t think you will be as disappointed as you think.
ADDED:
I forgot to mention the villains in the movie. They were all from America, Scotland, and Japan. Which makes sense really because everyone knows that these three countries are the major threats to world peace these days. Especially the Scots. You can’t trust anyone who would even dream-up haggis much less eat it.
2012 – It’s A Disaster!!
Vodpod videos no longer available.
2012 is the new end of the world flick coming out this winter which is evidently “an epic adventure about a global cataclysm that brings an end to the world and tells of the heroic struggle of the survivors.” It’s based on that whole doomsday Mayan calendar nonsense (the Mayan calendar ends in 2012 so naturally so does the world – simple, huh?)and looks like it will make the fantasy disasters of The Day After Tomorrow look like a walk in the park on a sunny day.
Anyway, I prefer the video above, but if you are interested in the real trailer here it is.
Vodpod videos no longer available.Is The New Transformers Movie Anti-Obama?
Variety’s David Cohen saw the latest “Transformers” movie — “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen” — and filed this report on its reference to President Obama, but not, at least in his eyes, in a good way.
Cohen writes, “So as usual in these movies, the federal bureaucrats are portrayed as annoying if not villainous. The President’s man, “Galloway,” is a bespectacled blowhard who becomes an obstacle to our brave fighting men and their alliance with the noble Autobots. Operating specifically under presidential authority, he makes all kinds of mischief. He says the President wants to try “diplomacy” against the evil Decepticons and hints the President would consider handing over Shia LaBouf’s character to be killed by them. He eventually is ditched by the fighting men (tricked into parachuting out the back of a transport). All this is par for the course in this kind of movie. In the first, there was a Rumsfeldian secretary of defense (played by Jon Voight) and a bit of dialogue from “the President” clearly meant to be Bush, with an obvious Bush impression on the dialogue.
“However, if memory serves, no real politicians were named in the first movie. The SecDef isn’t Rumsfeld. The president is not called by name.
“In this movie, exactly one real-life politician is named: “President Obama.” They went out of their way to make sure they named the craven, obstructionist president as Obama.”
I say good for two reasons.
One, the American people, including film makers, need to take swipes at our elected leaders now and again. It keeps them down where they belong which means on the same playing field as us. And Lord knows Hollywood threw enough punches at Bush (they still are), so poking Obama a bit seems to be only fair. If only comedians and the rest of the entertainment media would start living up to their responsibility instead of cheer leading 24/7 for our current president. And I won’t even mention how biased our so-called news media is, but I will say it’s nice to hear they are finally getting a room.
Secondly, does anyone doubt that Obama would try to negotiate with the Decepticons? Of course he would. You KNOW he would.
Negotiations coupled with an apology for America starting the first conflict of course, what with us taking Megatron prisoner and torturing him in Hoover Dam for all those years. And of course there would be calls from the left for investigations and prosecutions into Bush and Cheney’s criminal actions during initial war of aggression against these peaceful visitors from another planet. Calls which would naturally be followed by a series of interviews by a fawning media – think Oprah – trying to put a human face on these poor misunderstood robots who don’t really want to impose their beliefs on the rest of the world.
I could keep going but you get the idea.
So it’s nice to see a film that lets the American spirit shine forth instead of tamping it down. Americans want to see that kind of movie. They will pay money to see it and lots of it. If only Hollywood as a whole would recognize that.
Plus it has giant transforming robots and lots of explosions in it.
What more can a movie-goer ask for?
Eight
1. Democrats are warning health care lobbyists NOT to meet with Republicans. As Gabriel says at Ace of Spades, “Apparently, even talking to Republicans cannot be tolerated in Obama’s America.”
2. The National Organization for Women puts Letterman in his place for making a joke about raping a 14 year old girl. Good to hear. Now if only they would only tell all liberals to lay off the sexist crap when talking about women, especially Sarah Palin who, I hope anyway, will be running in 2012. Of course, that won’t happen because if they did that their arsenal would be pretty empty.
3. Democrats not so hot on Cap and Trade? Good, now if they will only stop this socialized health care we might have a chance at saving our nation.
4. Everyday normal Republicans. A video that for some reason won’t post on my blog. Click on over and watch it – it’s funny and so very true.
5. Let the Boomers die. The solution to the health care cost issue.
6. Why Letterman say what he says about the Palins. Man, that’s gonna leave a mark. As an aside, the reference is to this movie, which is great.
7. John Wayne is the United States of America. I missed this yesterday on the 30th anniversary of his death, but better late than never. He was the greatest and they don’t even make them close to him anymore, much less like him.
8. Obama moves terrorists from Gitmo to Bermuda. I wonder if they will add that wonderful attraction to the cruise brochures?
Seven (In White)
1. I Can’t Believe I’m Sitting Next To A Republican: A Survival Guide for Conservatives Marooned Among the Angry, Smug, and Terminally Self-Righteous . It’s designed for conservatives who live in blue areas, but I think it will work wonders for living with a blue son and several blue friends.
2. Obama to American business – Drop Dead. There’s an old saying, “Never ascribe to evil intent that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.” Well, I’m beginning to believe no one can be this stupid so am I being paranoid when I think there’s some evil intent here?
3. David Letterman jokes about statutory rape . . . or just rape . . . who the hell can tell with this moron. And of course the target is a conservative. Well, the daughter of a conservative. More specifically the 14 year old daughter of Sarah Palin. Which is okay to liberals because well, Palin is a conservative and anything goes when it’s about conservatives. Here’s the video.
I really despise liberal men. At least the ones in power – politicians and media types. They hate women. And are the most misogynist group in the world. And liberal women? At best they just ignore them and at worse they enable them because only liberal women are worthy of respect.
Letterman is despicable. He stopped being funny a decade ago and he is still bitter over not getting The Tonight Show. Thank God he didn’t.
As an aside, the left is SCARED TO DEATH of Sarah Palin. You can smell it on them. They know that without McCain tied around her neck she will be a formidable force in 2012. And I love it.
4. Speaking of Sarah Palin. Well, not Sarah Palin really, but how Katie Couric got her butt kicked by Palin. CBS Evening News with Katie Couric is cratering in the ratings.
NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams was the #1 evening newscast again last week with a more than 800,000 viewer lead over #2 World News with Charles Gibson. And with an average of 5.18M Total Viewers, the CBS Evening News with Katie Couric had its lowest viewership yet. In fact, it’s the lowest viewership since at least the 1991/92 season, as far back as Nielsen records track.
Yes, I know it’s a stretch to think that Couric’s shoddy treatment of Palin last year is the reason for her piss-poor viewership, but when you are so obviously biased that people can literally smell it coming out of their television screen every night you are going to lose conservative viewers. All who seem to be watching Fox News now, along with a boatload of Independents and a growing number of moderate Democrats.
5. Greg Gutfeld doesn’t really care about George Tiller’s murder. I have to admit I don’t either and for the same reasons. I especially liked this:
But I do have some definition of what being “pro-life” is. It goes like this: if you look at the people you love – your child, your sister, your spouse – and cannot imagine them never being born, then you’re a prolifer. But if you can imagine your loved ones never being alive – then congrats, you’re a pro choicer – and I admire your gumption. Oddly, I’ve never met a pro-choice advocate who can say she wished she’d aborted her obviously adorable child (I’m still waiting!).
Let me be clear. I do not condone this man’s murder. And the man who did it should be punished to the fullest extent of the law. But when we start giving the same – no more, because it deserves more – attention to the murder of an Army recruiter by a Islamic terrorist right here in our own country then you may get some concern from me. Until then not so much.
6. When an 11 year old boy wants to leave half-way through a Will Ferrell movie, you just know it is bad. Ferrell passed his expiration date a while back. He’s just not funny anymore and there are better people doing funnier movies now. For kids and adults.
7. The beginning of the end for private health insurance. Are you folks who voted for Obama feeling all hopeful about this change?
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The Reluctant Optimist 
