No One As Irish As Barry O’Bama

Eh, maybe one of those 57 states was Ireland?

Bush’s Resignation Speech

“Normally, I start these things out by saying “My Fellow Americans”, not doing it this time. If the polls are any indication, I don’t know who more than half of you are anymore. I do know something terrible has happened, and that you’re really not fellow Americans any longer.

I’ll cut right to the chase here: I quit. Now before anyone gets all in lather about me quitting to avoid impeachment, or to avoid prosecution, let me assure you: There’s been no breaking of laws or impeachable offenses in this office.

The reason I’m quitting is simple. I’m fed up with you people. I’m fed up because you have no understanding of what’s really going on in the world. Or of what’s going on in this once-great nation of ours. And the majority of you are too damned lazy to do your homework and figure it out.

Let’s start local. You’ve been sold a bill of goods by politicians and the news media. Polls show that the majority of you think the economy is in the tank. And that’s despite record numbers of homeowners, including record numbers of MINORITY homeowners. And while we’re mentioning minorities, I’ll point out that minority business ownership is at an all-time high. Our unemployment rate is as low as it ever was during the Clinton administration. I’ve mentioned all those things before, but it doesn’t sink in.

Despite the shock to our economy of 9/11, the stock market has rebounded to record levels and more Americans than ever are participating in these markets. Meanwhile, all you can do is whine about gas prices, and most of you are too damn stupid to realize that gas prices are high because there’s increased demand in other parts of the world, and because a small handful of noisy idiots are more worried about polar bears and beachfront property than your economic security. We face real threats in the world.

Don’t give me this “blood for oil” crap. If I were trading blood for oil I would’ve already seized Iraq ’s oil fields and let the rest of the country go to hell. And don’t give me this ‘Bush Lied; People Died’ crap either. If I were the liar you morons take me for, I could’ve easily had chemical weapons planted in Iraq so they could be ‘discovered.’ Instead, I owned up to the fact that the intelligence was faulty.

Let me remind you that the rest of the world thought Saddam had the goods, same as me. Let me also remind you that regime change in Iraq was official US policy before I came into office. Clinton established that policy. Bet you didn’t know that, did you?

You idiots need to understand that we face a unique enemy. Back during the cold war, there were two major competing political and economic models squaring off. We won that war, but we did so because fundamentally, the Communists wanted to survive, just as we do. We were simply able to out spend and out-tech them.

That’s not the case this time. The soldiers of our new enemy don’t care if they survive. In fact, they want to die. That’d be fine, as long as they weren’t also committed to taking as many of you with them as they can. But they are. They want to kill you, and the bastards are all over the globe. You should be grateful that they haven’t gotten any more of us here in the United States since September 11. But you’re not. That’s because you’ve got no idea how hard a small number of intelligence, military, law enforcement, and homeland security people have worked to make sure of that. When this whole mess started, I warned you that this would be a long and difficult fight. I’m disappointed how many of you people think a long and difficult fight amounts to a single season of ‘Survivor.’

Instead, you’ve grown impatient. You’re incapable of seeing things through the long lens of history, the way our enemies do. You think that wars should last a few months, a few years, tops.

Making matters worse, you actively support those who help the enemy. Every time you buy the New York Times, every time you send a donation to a cut-and-run Democrat’s political campaign, well, you might just as well FedEx a grenade launcher to a Jihadist. It amounts to the same thing.

In this day and age, it’s easy enough to find the truth. It’s all over the Internet; it just isn’t on the pages of the New York Times or on NBC News. But even if it were, I doubt you’d be any smarter. Most of you would rather watch American Idol.

I could say more about your expectations that the government will always be there to bail you out, even if you’re too stupid to leave a city that’s below sea level and has a Cat 5 hurricane approaching.

I could say more about your idiotic belief that government, not your own wallet, is where the money comes from. But I’ve come to the conclusion that were I to do so, it would sail right over your heads.

So, I quit. I’m going back to Crawford. I’ve got an energy-efficient house down there (Al Gore could only dream of) and the capability to be fully self-sufficient. No one ever heard of Crawford before I got elected, and as soon as I’m done here pretty much no one will ever hear of it again. Maybe I’ll be lucky enough to die of old age before the last pillars of America fall.

Oh, and by the way, Cheney’s quitting too.

That means Pelosi is your new President. You asked for it - you can have her. Watch what she does carefully, because I still have a glimmer of hope that there are just enough of you remaining who are smart enough to turn this thing around in 2008.

So that’s it.

God bless what’s left of America . Some of you know what I mean. The rest of you - kiss my ass!”

Stolen in full from Blonde Sagacity because it just reads better this way than linking half of it. Check her blog out though as she and her co-bloggers do good work.

Overkill

This is a tragic . . . waste of resources. There are easier and more cost effective ways to kill a cat.

EFFERSON TOWNSHIP, N.J. — A piece of artillery that was apparently misfired by the military crashed through the roof of a home miles away Friday and injured a young girl’s cat, which had to be euthanized, officials said.

No people were injured when the 2-pound piece hit the Jefferson Township home about 2 1/2 miles from the Picatinny Arsenal and landed in the girl’s bed, said Peter Rowland, arsenal spokesman. She wasn’t home, but her cat was sleeping on the bed.

The homeowner told authorities she heard a loud noise around 2:40 p.m. and found the 6-by-4-inch object.

Picatinny officials told The Star-Ledger of Newark they were investigating. The base had been conducting tests Friday, and it wasn’t immediately clear what type of artillery hit the home.

Picatinny is the site of the Armament Research, Development and Engineering Center, whose mission is to conduct research, development and engineering for weapons systems.

Seriously, I’m glad no people were hurt. And I am sure the little girl is going to miss her kitty. It was just too easy a dead cat joke to pass up.

More Links

1. I’m sorry Barack, but visiting your mom in Pakistan while on spring break is not foreign policy experience.

2. I hate to complain, but this seems more a money making scheme than a movement.

3. Schlitz beer is going back to their original recipe. Well, it couldn’t possibly be worse than the current recipe.

4. Democrats determined to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.

5. Speaking of the war, the country remains split on the surge in Iraq. Along party lines. Surprise, surprise.

6. Then again these are the people who don’t believe we are making progress, so what can you expect: (Hat-tip to Groovy.)

7. Never trust a puppy.

He he, you got Rick Rolled.

Juicy Links

1. Like I’ve said before, global warming is still very much in dispute.

2. This appears to be more about the so-called housing crisis than anything else. What is disturbing to me is that Americans think it is government’s fault that people were stupid enough to buy more house than they could afford and that it is government’s responsibility to bail them out of their stupidity. Nonsense. Plus, what does “going in the wrong direction” mean exactly? Well, it means different things to different people. Had I been polled and asked that question I would have said yes because I think that our open-borders policy is the wrong direction. I think retreating from Iraq is the wrong direction. I think electing a Democrat as president is the wrong direction. So when you think about it, the question is meaningless as are the poll results.

3. Obama’s support softens. I’m not surprised. When people get to really know him they don’t like what they see as much. He’s still the nominee though. Because of his glamour and not his substance, of course. Mark my words, if elected he will have a Jimmy Carter presidency.

4. British Muslims would have killed thousands in major terrorist attack if not caught. The threat is real, folks.

5. Male rock fans vote Republican? So Led Zeppelin influenced me in more ways than I thought.

6. Sounds like a nice place to me. I do love Asian . . . food.

7. Star Trek, 60s Rock, and psychedelic drugs. Via Southern Appeal.

8. The hazards of cocktails in space. None made with Absolut vodka, of course.

9. Obama’s, and the Democrat’s, patriotism problem.

10. Have you seen Hillary’s second “phone call at 3:00 am” political ad? Well, here’s the transcript of how McCain would react to such a call.

The phone rings, waking President McCain. Groggily, he answers it. “Hello?”“Mr. President. There is a foreclosure crisis. We need action now.”

McCain looks at the clock. It’s 3 A.M. “Are you psychotic?”

“This is very important.”

“Who is doing business at his hour?”

“We can’t wait for a decision on what to do.”

“It’s 3 A.M.! What the hell can we do right now?!”

“We need to make a plan.”

“Are honestly telling me you didn’t find out there was a problem with foreclosures until right now?”

“Well… I found out earlier today. I forgot to tell you until now.”

“I will strangle you!”

“That won’t help the foreclosure crisis.”

“Do you have a family? I will murder your family and make you watch!”

“That seems a bit extreme.”

“It’s 3 A.M.! You do not wake me with crap like this at this hour!”

JOHN MCCAIN: Ready to answer the call appropriately at 3 AM.

That, my friends, is a man ready to be President.

John McCain’s Newest Political Ad: Heroes

Hat-tip to Red-State.

You And Your Racist Friends

One is just a coincidence maybe (or maybe not).  Two is just bad luck.  Three or more is definitely a pattern, don’t you think?

Hat-tip to IMAO.

Bring Your Daughter To War Day

BTW, military people will find this amusing.  It’s the same kind of humor that homicide detectives, emergency room personnel, and so forth use to keep their spirits up. 

Hat-tip to Op For.

Talking Bout Them Dems

1.  It’s bad enough that Obama gets his mentoring from the anti-American, racist, anti-Italian Reverend Wright, but who the hell reads bathroom stalls to get a sense of America?

2.  If Obama is the nominee 28% of Hillary-supporting Dems will vote for McCain. That’s good news - for McCain. To be fair, 19% of Obama supporters would vote for McCain if Hillary is the nominee. Either way, McCain benefits which is a good thing.

3. Oops, Hillary’s pants are on fire. Those nasty videos get you every time. And speaking of videos, here’s a great one.

4.  Just another funny video I found over at Groovy Vic’s place. The funny part starts at about the o.42 second point.

5.  Oil for Democrats?

6.  Even if I thought Barack Hussein Obama was worth voting for, I could never get past the delicate little flower he married.

7. Sixty-six percent of Democrats want both Obama and Hillary to stay in the race for the nomination. I always thought Dems thrived on chaos and it seems I was correct.  In this case chaos benefits McCain which again is a good thing.

8. A credentials battle at the Democratic convention? Oh please let Christmas come early this year.

Reverend Wright’s Early Work

Caution: Profanity and parody of racism.

This Obama-Wright story seems to have legs with little tidbits  showing up every day. Whether they are scratchy, short, chubby Janeane Gerafalo legs that are going to give out in a short walk or silky, long, toned Angelina Jolie legs that could run a marathon I just don’t know yet. 

Via Ace.

O’Bama

Yeah, I know I am obsessed with him but it’s only because I seriously think he would be a disaster for our country. 

Marines In Berkeley

A Daily Show video skewering the anti-war nut group, Code Pink, and its moronic and pathetic attacks on Marine recruiters in Berkeley. I can’t get it to embed, but it is absolutely hilarious.  Go see it, you will not be disappointed.

Best interchange between the disguised Marine Reservist/Daily Show Correspondent and a Code Pick dimwit who is spouting-off about their free speech rights:

Disguised Marine: “If only there was an organization that was sworn to protect free speech? ”  

Totally Clueless Code Pink Dimwit: “Wouldn’t that be great.”

Disguised Marine:  “That would be outstanding. Righttt?”

Ten Things

1. Welcome to the preview of a Democratic president and congress and say hello to higher taxes. But the money will be for the children, right?

2. Welcome to the world of the Pastor of Barack Hussein and Michelle Obama, a man who  is Obama’s acknowledged “spiritual mentor” for 20 years, married the couple, baptized their kids and who’s sermon titled “Audacity of Hope” was the inspiration for Obama’s book of the same name:

• “The government gives them the drugs, builds bigger prisons, passes a three-strike law and then wants us to sing ‘God Bless America.’ No, no, no, God damn America, that’s in the Bible for killing innocent people,” he said in a 2003 sermon. “God damn America for treating our citizens as less than human. God damn America for as long as she acts like she is God and she is supreme.”
• “We bombed Hiroshima, we bombed Nagasaki, and we nuked far more than the thousands in New York and the Pentagon, and we never batted an eye,” Rev. Wright said in a sermon on Sept. 16, 2001.
• “We have supported state terrorism against the Palestinians and black South Africans, and now we are indignant because the stuff we have done overseas is now brought right back to our own front yards. America’s chickens are coming home to roost,” he told his congregation.
• “We started the AIDS virus . . . We are only able to maintain our level of living by making sure that Third World people live in grinding poverty. . . .”

Nope, he’s not Obama, but you know darn well that people don’t belong to churches for decades unless they believe what the pastor and the rest of the congregation believes.  If they don’t, they leave for other churches. It’s science (not to get into a whole faith/science debate here).   And by the way.  He raised his kids in this church listening to this crap.  What kind of people do that?   How good is his raved-about judgement if he does that?  And to make things worse - he simply will not dump the guy.  He downplays it and says he doesn’t agree but then makes excuses for this racist while at the same time playing the race card on anyone who criticises him about anything.  This isn’t the way a man who is supposed to be a “race healer, not a race warrior” should act.

3. Speaking of science - sort of anyway - the founder of the Weather Channel is suing Al Gore for fraud over scam that is global warming.  Sweet.

4.  Anti-war reporting is helping Iraqi insurgents. Well, duhhh. This war has without a doubt been more difficult, costly, and lasted longer due to the main stream media’s concentration on bad news and anti-war rhetoric rather than good news (of which there has been plenty), pro-American stories, and tales of our many heroes over there. There are so many people here in America who should be ashamed for supporting out enemies this way.  Despite this bombardment of bad news, it appears that only 18 percent of Americans think we should withdraw immediately from Iraq. Wow. Americans really do prefer winning over losing.

5.  The Tennessee flying saucer house. I’ve seen it in person. It’s pretty cool.

6. Man celebrates his 100th birthday at Hooters. Viva Viagra!

7.  More Obama news. Seems he got $1,000,000 in earmarks for the Chicago hospital where his wife is Vice President of Community Affairs. At a sweet salary of $316,962 which is an increase from $121,910 just before her husband was elected to the Senate. Coincidence, I am sure.  I’m also sure they are she is worth every penny.

8.  And what about that Al Quaeda - Saddam connection?  You know the one that Democrats say never existed and Republicans say did, but have been hard-pressed to prove beyond a reasonable doubt?  Well, it looks like there was one after all.

Captured Iraqi documents have uncovered evidence that links the regime of Saddam Hussein to regional and global terrorism, including a variety of revolutionary, liberation, nationalist and Islamic terrorist organizations. While these documents do not reveal direct coordination and assistance between the Saddam regime and the al Qaeda network, they do indicate that Saddam was willing to use, albeit cautiously, operatives affiliated with al Qaeda as long as Saddam could have these terrorist-operatives monitored closely. Because Saddam’s security organizations and Osama bin Laden’s terrorist network operated with similar aims (at least in the short term), considerable overlap was inevitable when monitoring, contacting, financing, and training the same outside groups. This created both the appearance of and, in some way, a “de facto” link between the organizations. At times, these organizations would work together in pursuit of shared goals but still maintain their autonomy and independence because of innate caution and mutual distrust. Though the execution of Iraqi terror plots was not always successful, evidence shows that Saddam’s use of terrorist tactics and his support for terrorist groups remained strong up until the collapse of the regime.

There’s no “smoking gun” in this report, but as a criminal and counterintelligence investigator with 24 years experience I can tell you that most cases are made with circumstantial evidence not smoking guns. This is good stuff. There was a connection. Not that any Democrat is ever going to believe it, but there was a connection.

9. It keeps coming back to Obama. This time he voted against his own tax and spending bill. You know, the one he keeps campaigning on. Makes your head spin, I tell ya.

10.  I don’t care who she is, no way I would pay this unless I get to play with those hooters.  She would also have to promise not to talk all evening.

UPDATE:

To Number 2 above:  Obama has now called Wright’s statements “inflammatory and appalling” and adds:

“Let me say at the outset that I vehemently disagree and strongly condemn the statements that have been the subject of this controversy,” he said in the statement. “I categorically denounce any statement that disparages our great country or serves to divide us from our allies. I also believe that words that degrade individuals have no place in our public dialogue, whether it’s on the campaign stump or in the pulpit. In sum, I reject outright the statements by Rev. Wright that are at issue.”

Took him long enough. And I suppose I should take him at his word, but to be truthful I don’t believe him at all. He had to do this after all the race-cards he had been throwing at Hillary or he wouldn’t be able to throw anymore. Still, politically it lets the MSM off the hook as they can now call the incident over and move on to other things. They hated covering it, the little they did, and this means they concentrate on Hillary and McCain again.

Plus, his statement isn’t all it seems to be. Okay, maybe they are over-analyzing it, but hey, it’s not like he’s the only candidate that has been subject to analyzing.  Then again, his distancing himself from Wright was predicted by the parties involved.

Stuff I Found On The Fox News Web Site

1.   Of all the sins I thought I might go to hell for, driving my SUV wasn’t one of them. As if I didn’t have to apologize enough for the Church already.  Then again, the Southern Baptists are also buying into the global warming nonsense, so maybe lunacy is interdenominational.

2.  If I was dork riding a bike in too-short black pants, black tie, short-sleeved white shirt, white socks and goober black shoes, I don’t think I would have the nerve to mock any other religion.  Except maybe Scientology, which literally begs to be mocked.

3.  Man, this poor guy just can’t catch a break.  They need to bring the party to him.

4.  Yes, it exists. Being a gentleman that’s all I am going to say on that.

5.  Obligatory comments on Democratic Governor Spitzer’s fall from grace: a) He is a moron, b) His wife is a babe - I’d hit that, c) Fifty-five hundred dollars for an hour? Who the hell pays that much for sex? I mean, I love sex, but damn, $5,500? Is that prorated? It comes down to about $92 a minute so can I buy $276 worth?

6.  If you a conservative in Mississippi go vote for Hillary in today’s Democratic primary. It’s fun and not a mortal sin. Venial maybe, but not mortal.

7.  I never thought what Madonna did was rock, but what do I know? And doesn’t she look like an old guy now?  Her arms look very familiar.

Madonna’s in the middle by the way.  That’s Iggy Pop on the left and Effeminate Pop on the right.

Pick Obama’s Middle Name

Pick Barack Hussein Obama’s new middle name? I like Barack Notamuslim Obama. It’s catchy and directly to the point. Although Barack Milhouse Obama is good, too.  

This is catching on.  There’s an e-Bay auction to choose his new middle-name along with a birth certificate. Brilliant.

Hat-tip to Ace who got it from Fausta’s Blog.